The worst part of throwing a party can be getting people to leave when you’re ready to call it a night. We’d like to recommend some titles for the tried and true record-that-will-clear-a-room option. It’s a delicate procedure. Playing something awful just to clear a room is a dick move and you’re not going to enjoy it any more than your victims. No, the best route is to find something of quality that plays counter to the tone of the party. For example…

5)The Chameleons – What Does Anything Mean? Basically

What is it?: The second album by the legendary Chameleons. A post-punk tour-de-force that would go on to influence more bands than it would sell albums.

Play at the end of: Any kind of upbeat, rock-free dance party.

It will clear them out because: Make no mistake, this album is fantastic, but to the uninitiated its dated production, moments of rhythm-free melancholy and emotion-drenched tenor vocals will kill the buzz of anyone who’s acclimated to pules-pounding beats.

You win because: The album is invigorating enough to keep you awake while you’re clearing empty plastic cups and half-eaten plates of hoers devours. At the same time, its sobering starkness will make you realize how tired you are.

Estimated number of songs to end party: Two and a half, unless someone at the party is a closet fan, in which case you’re going to have to open a fresh bottle.

4)Any Kompakt Compilation

What is it?: Kompakt is a German record label that serves as a host to a multitude of contemporary electronic acts. The Kompakt sound usually blends warmth & melody with more conventional minimalist-ambient textures. It has been referred to as minimalist techno, micro-house or just plain ambient.

Play at the end of: Any kind of rock-heavy party. Be careful, these compilations could just as easily get a late-night party started. Context is everything.

It will clear them out because: The sparse, droning nature of most Kompakt artists is not conducive to your regular party atmosphere, unless people are sitting quietly, listening thoughtfully and sipping wine. In which case, why stop the party?

You win because: Kompakt is currently one of the best labels out there. Even casual fans of electronic or ambient music would be remiss to not give them a go.

Estimated number of songs to end party: Between one and two.

3)Finntroll – Nattfödd

What is it?: Finntroll, which means Finnish Troll, are perhaps the world’s only band to combine metal with hummpa, a Finnish iteration of polka music. They are, not surprisingly, from Finland.

Play at the end of: A dance party, a classic-rock party, an ambient party….. You know what? As long as no one’s playing dungeons and dragons, you should be good.

It will clear them out because: Finntroll combine the aggressiveness of metal with the eccentric inaccessability of hummpa. It should clash with just about anything, except metal or polka.

You win because: These guys rule. Polka and metal might not sound like a natural marriage, but listening to these guys, you’d think the genres had evolved together before splintering into two separate entities.

Estimated number of songs to end party: Before the end of the opening track, “Vindfärd/Människopesten”.

2)MC Paul Barman – Paullelujah!

What is it?: The full-length debut from Rhode Island’s MC Paul Barman, a sort of hip-hop Woody Allen who’s bread and butter consist of building palindromes, self-deprecation and toilet humor.

Play at the end of: Any party dominated by bad mainstream hip-hop, or any music that takes itself too seriously.

It will clear them out because: With his nasally delivery, pretentious word play and childish sense of humor, Paul Barman can be a tough pill to swallow.

You win because: Paul deserves more credit than one might suspect from a casual listen. His rhymes are carefully constructed, his over-the-top self-deprecation is coupled with equally excessive self-aggrandization and with production work from the likes of MF Doom and Prince Paul, there’s some serious hip-hop pedigree on board.

Estimated number of songs to end party: Start with the tenth track, “Burping & Farting”, and watch the room clear faster than if there was a fire.

1) Scott Walker – The Drift

What is it?: The 2006 release from Scott Walker, an icon since he first achieved fame as a member of The Walker Brothers forty years prior. (There were no brothers in the band.) The Drift is an uncompromising and unsettling album.

Play at the end of: A Scott Walker listening party, and what a party it would be. Scott, Scott 2, Scott 3 and Scott 4 in succession.

It will clear them out because: Early Scott Walker solo albums are experimental and eccentric to a point, but they generally play within the 60′s pop-crooner mold. On the other hand, The Drift is an album seemingly designed to inspire a sense of low dread and unease.

You win because: As bleak and haunting as the album is, it’s a masterful statement from a first-rate artist. Personally, once everyone left, I’d probably play the first side of Scott 2 to stave off any nightmares The Drift might inspire.

Estimated number of songs to end party: Ten seconds.