I worked at Pure Pop for exactly a year.  My favorite part of the job was grading the condition of the used vinyl.  My least favorite was selling concert tickets.  Anyway, the music you hear when you shop there is an employee’s pick.  You get to pick one album and then you have wait for the other employee’s picks to run through before you get play another.  These days I’m a bartender at The OP, which means I can play whatever the fuck I want all day long.  Sometimes people will make suggestions or requests (one customer got really steamed when I skipped over Donna Summer‘s 18-minute rendition of “MacArthur Park.” Um, sorry…NO), but I usually ignore them.  Also, there are 10,000 songs on my iPod.  I have lots of music to choose from on any given day for any kind of shitty mood I might be in.  So, this is The OP top five.

1> The Rolling Stone 500 Songs playlist and The Pitchfork 500 Songs playlist.

People on the internet are crazy.  Somebody actually took these lists of great songs, spent time compiling them, and then put them on the internet as a bit torrent file.  The Rolling Stone one is great for the older patrons, who sometimes look very surprised that I know who Little Richard and Bill Haley are.  The Pitchfork one is for the younger folks.  Either way, all I have to do is open the playlist up, hit shuffle, and it’s great songs all day long.  Also, it’s like radio.  When a song you dig comes on the radio, it’s different than playing it at home.  It’s more fresh because it’s unexpected.  The Rolling Stone playlist will make you realize how many songs are about losing the one you love.  I’m gonna go with 98%.

2> LCD Soundsystem, “Sound Of Silver”

Whenever I put this on at least five people will come up and ask me who it is.  I’m pretty sure by the time they sit down they’ve already forgotten.  No matter.  I’ve watched old drunk people dance to it.  On multiple occasions.  Sounds like silver to me.  It’s a lot like the Beta Band scene in “High Fidelity” except nobody goes out and buys it.

3> Pavement, “Grounded”

I never get tired of this song, but every time I play it at the bar at least one person locks eyes with me and nods.  They know.  I know.

4> Sinead O’Connor, “Nothing Compares 2 U”

Playing this makes the girls in the bar very happy, especially when it’s late and they’re all drunk.  It makes me happy, too.

5> Silence.

The first example of silence I’ll use is its use at the end of the night when you want people to leave.  Lights bright, music off.  Usually effective.  The other example occurred yesterday, during Beatles Day.  When I worked at restaurants if the customers talked too loud (sometimes it’s deafening) I’d simply turn the music down a bit and they’d get a little quieter.  Yesterday, a few drunken patrons were shouting their opinions over horse racing at increasing volumes.  I tried the quiet trick.  It didn’t work.  Oh, well.