Phew, this solves it all. Turns out that the actual quality of any music is not something merely relative to the personal tastes of the listener. Thank God, this solves all my best-of-the-year arguments. Around 2001, Tim Midgett, bassist for Silkworm, wrote The End of Subjectivity: A Guide to Musical Correctness. Read the full thing here: http://www.matadorrecords.com/escandalo/6/subjectivity.html

The formula is such: (c@ + E) X (rP + iP + T) = mc  

c@ = coherent aesthetic…  The degree to which a subject is capable of formulating and understanding (not necessarily explaining) a singular theory that lies at the heart of the subject’s work. E = execution…  The degree to which a subject is capable of applying its aesthetic. rP = real or true power…  The degree to which a subject is capable of creating a substantive product of lasting importance by applying its aesthetic. iP = imagined power… What the subject believes to be its rP. T = tension adjustment… The degree to which the subject’s musical correctness quotient must be modified to compensate for misjudgement by the subject of its abilities. Derivation of T: If rP = iP, then T = 0… If rP > iP, then T = 1/2 (rP – iP)…  If rP < iP, then T = 2(rP – iP). And finally: mc = musical correctness… The degree to which the subject is musically correct.

The scores can range from -140 to 400 but by his calculations the highest ever was 361 for  the Lou Reed led, pre-reunion Velvet Underground, and -126 for the Eagles reunion. Or Velvets (10 + 9) X (10 + 8 + 1) = 361 and Eagles reunion (8 + 10) X (1 + 10 – 18)= -126.

Some of my own calculations: Dan Deacon (10 + 9) X (7 + 5 + 1) = 247…….  Turkey Bouillon Mafia (6 + 9) X (6 + 7 – 2) = 165……….  GNR: Chinese Democracy (10 + 6) X (5 + 10 – 10) =  80. That’s right, due to Axel’s twisted head, my own party band is more than twice as musically correct as the new Guns N Roses album.